a better you – Cynthia D. Griffin

self-care, self-care practice, self-empowerment, self-improvement

How To Start A Self-Care Practice

Posted on January 14, 2021 by Cynthia D. Griffin

Last weeks post, Why Is Self-Care Important?, I got the ball rolling on what I hope will be a regular blog series talking about self-care. I say hope, because self-care is my number one priority. It comes before even committing to do things like writing posts for this blog.

Be Aware Of Triggers

In fact, I try to stay away from any hard commitments on purpose, because I can’t stand being on hard deadlines. It’s one of the things I have recognized as a trigger point for me, so I try to soften this trigger point as much as I can.

That, my friends, is one important aspect of self-care. Recognizing your triggers, and being kind enough to yourself to stay away from them, or find a way around them, or soften things until you can face the trigger more head on.

Learn To Know How You Feel

Self-care is about being aware of how you feel. It’s about noticing when you get angry or upset and asking yourself why. And asking––Is this really worth getting upset about? Is this worth my peace of mind?

Does something, someone, or a situation make you feel bad? What can you do to minimize or cut any of these feel bad things from your life?

Minimize what feels bad and increase the good feeling stuff (whatever that might be for you). Do more of what you love. Do more of what you feel passionate about. Do more of what lifts you up.

Build Up More Awareness Of Yourself

Self-care is about getting in touch with yourself and recognizing what feels good and what doesn’t. Do things on a daily basis that’s going to help you get the awareness you need to identify your emotions.

For me that has been meditation and yoga. These two things have allowed me to raise my awareness significantly over time.

There are other ways to do the same thing if mediation and yoga is not for you. Do some research and see what resonates with you. I personally think that any sort of regular exercise, even just walking everyday, would be helpful. Regular movement of the body and mind are important for not just physical health, but mental as well.

An important part of self-care is taking care of yourself. That means implementing choices that are going to help you on a physical, mental, and emotional level.

Do Something For You First Thing In The Morning

The best way to get the day going on the right foot is to do something for you as soon as you roll out of bed. It doesn’t matter what it is or how long it takes, the main priority is to get those good feelings going right away. When you feel good, the day will go a whole lot better for you.

My usual go-to first thing in the morning is to journal. I do this either in bed before breakfast, or first thing after breakfast. I can spend anywhere from 10 minutes to 30 minutes journaling. It just depends on what I need for that particular day.

My journaling can include releasing negative thoughts and emotions, but I also make sure to end my journaling session with some sort of uplifting writing that sets me up for my good mood to start the day. This is why I created the Journaling To Feel Good series.

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better life, empowerment, goals, self-improvement, writing

The Best Way to Navigate the New Year

Posted on January 1, 2020 by Cynthia D. Griffin

Taken from https://www.pixelstalk.net/hd-peaceful-wallpapers-free/

It’s a brand new year, and with a new year comes new goals, plans, and a new energy to take action. A lot can be accomplished with the forward momentum of a new year, but it can also be easy to veer off course and land in a rut with wheels spinning.

That was me. I was spinning my wheels earlier today. I knew it was time for action. I had spent the better part of November and December learning, thinking, planning, and growing into what I wanted to do for 2020 (and yes, there’s some awesome stuff coming).

So the first of January arrived, and I was ready to go. But instead of going, I became stuck in a fog of anxiousness, not sure what to do first. My mind stuck in a loop as I considered what I would be doing for the next month and over the next year.

I have learned from past experience that when I this happens, the best thing to do is to just stop everything. So I took a few hours to go outside and enjoy the gorgeous, warm day we happened to be blessed with on the first day of January.

After some relaxation and contemplation, I realized where I messed up. I was paying so much attention to tomorrow, the next day, next week, next month, ect. I wasn’t actually paying attention to the now. And the now was pretty freaking awesome as I basked in golden sunlight.

Why the heck was I so upset in the first place?

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empowerment, journaling, Journaling Discoveries, writing

Journaling Discoveries: Enjoying the Journey, Even the Not So Great Parts

Posted on October 18, 2019 by Cynthia D. Griffin

“Stop worrying about the potholes in the road and enjoy the journey.” ––Babs Hoffman

It’s not always easy to enjoy the journey, especially when the journey appears to be a struggle. How can we enjoy the struggles? Is that even possible?

I have an aversion to struggles. Maybe this is a universal thing. I mean, really, who wants to have conflicts and continual issues in life? So why is it that people talk about enjoying the journey, or just letting the process unfold like it’s some secret joke as they smile and walk away? Will someone please let me in on the punchline?

My family and I recently went through a particularly “fun” struggle from mid -September, until last week. My husband was rear ended in a car accident that left us without reliable transportation for nearly a month. It was a tough time for us. But it also was a bit magical too. Okay, maybe a lot magical.

I had finally decided that I was done with feeling so upset and twisted up by life events. I wanted to ride this struggle with a little more enjoyment. I decided to try out the sage advice of those who would smile and say “enjoy the journey,” because not enjoying the journey was becoming too much drama for me. Why was I torturing myself so much over a freaking car? It was just a car after all.

I won’t say I was perfect. I had moments and whole days where the situation of having no car really got to me. But then I’d catch myself, shake it off, and try to find the things in life that were going very well for us. And I have to say, we do have a whole lot going right, and I don’t think I realized how much until this incident.

So I spent a lot of time basking in the things I was appreciative for. I had whole days that I decided to “pretend” we had no car issue and that all was fantastic. I even imagined our new car in the garage, and us taking it out for a ride as a family. And you know, doing these things really helped me enjoy the struggle more than I ever managed to before. It was a huge step forward for me.

The car incident also had some magical results too. A big one was my husband’s coworkers stepping up to offer him rides to and from work. It was really great to feel that sort of love and support. We also ended up with a much newer and bigger car than what we started out with. And we love it so very much (and yes, we’ve taken the Chevy Equinox out for several family rides since purchasing it).

Another major benefit from all of this is it’s really made me reevaluate how I deal with adversity. I’ve always looked at adversity and struggle as negative. I always felt a desire to avoid such instances at all costs. But maybe the struggles aren’t so terrible? Maybe they help us find clarity and help us understand what we really do want out of life?

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better life, empowerment, finding balance

5 Steps to Taking Back Your Power

Posted on October 8, 2019 by Cynthia D. Griffin

Many of us give our power away on a daily basis, and we don’t even realize it. It’s an automatic reflex that chips away at the power we each hold inside of us. After a while, we can feel completely powerless because we’ve allowed so much to be leeched away.

Did you know that you can take that power back? You can feel more energized and happy. You can feel lighthearted and peaceful.

The first step to feeling more powerful of yourself and your life is to recognize who or what you are giving your power to. Anything that steals your time and energy is considered a power stealer.

What’s stealing your power?

People (family, friends, coworkers, acquaintances)
Things (books, tv, phone, computer, ect.)
Situations (this can be anything that makes you feel drained and empty)
Yourself (Your thought patterns and negative emotions)

Notice I put yourself on the list. It actually should be number one, because I believe that is the biggest power stealer of all. How many times have you caught yourself in a downward spiral of negative emotions? Or have you caught yourself giving yourself a bunch of negative self-talk? Be honest. It happens a lot, doesn’t it?

That’s okay, because being aware of bad habits is a good first step to releasing the power stealers so you can move forward in a more confident way.

Step 1: Make a List

So first things first, make a list of all your power stealers (including yourself), and just allow yourself to be an observer of your own life. Don’t judge. Don’t beat yourself up for falling down and letting the power stealer(s) suck you dry. Tomorrow is always a brand new day. A fresh start to try again.

Step 2: Be Patient

That leads me to the second step. Be patient with yourself. Don’t expect to be perfect or to sweep your whole life clean of power stealers overnight (or even in a week or two). It takes dedicated time and effort. Slowly, you will notice a change as you have more energy and creativity in which to do things.

Step 3: Find Balance

The next step is to find balance. What can you do to keep yourself centered and focused on what’s important in your life? Maybe even set up a daily routine that helps you shine. Try doing one or more of the following…

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